I'm sure this post will surprise no one that actually knows me. I'm southern born, Dallas to be exact (for you slackers who haven't read my whole, beautiful blog), and I was raised a certain way.
For instance, I hand write thank you notes for everything anyone has every done for me in the whole wide world at any time. Everyone should have a thank you note in my handwriting by now.
I remember birthdays and anniversaries, the day you got your tonsils removed, and that dog that died when you were a teenager? That too. And, I write you to let you know that I remember. Not to browbeat with my fabulous memory OR manners, but because it was drilled into my head that this is What You Do.
I've been told I'm a very polite person. Yes, because I didn't want to get beaten (just kidding!). I actually revel in my politeness. I say 'thank you' for every goddamned thing anyone ever does for me, not once, but most likely a hundred times. Waitresses wonder if it's a tic. 'Thank you for the extra napkins. Oh, did I thank you for those napkins? Oh, by the way, thank you for those napkins in case you didn't hear me before.' Yeah, that tic.
So, having grown up with these severe southern sensibilities, I admit that my expectations of people are probably quite a bit higher than is normal in this age of go, go, go, email, text, Twitter, Facebook (good god, Facebook) and whatever other social network that's comes alive and saturates your brain with the push of a button on your iPad/iPhone/Android/PC/laptop.
I love politeness. Love it, remember it, make note of it, mention it, frame it and hang it in my head to remember how amazing the person who has propagated this lovely THING that I hold so close to my fluttering heart is. Oh my (can you hear Scarlett O'Hara AT ALL?).
Having said all of that, I say this: politeness is a fading art. It is disappointing that people are losing respect for one another and, in doing so, the small ways that tell people, 'you are important' or 'I appreciate you' is going away. And that's really sad.
I just ask that you extend to me the same courtesy I extend to you. If I've responded to you, write me back. If you call and I return that call, call again. If you like something I've done or said or written, tell me about it. I can assure you that I will make my whole family proud and return the favor.
6 comments:
Thank you…..lol, ok sorry I just had to do that!
I tend to do the same and will go out of my way to thank someone who has done something nice for me.
In Vegas special, I don’t see the politeness from customers that I use too. Not all of the “Younger generation” is like that, but a majority of them are.
ftj
I think politeness is a little used virtue in today's society and that's always so disappointing to me. But, my biggest issue is when someone contacts ME and I contact them back (fairly quickly) and I never hear from them again. I really dislike that so much.
I get that in my line of work all the time Nikki. I spend hours pricing work and sometimes NEVER hear back. A simple Thank You can go a long ways.
There is a declining level of courtesy in the culture, and partially this is a reflection of coarseness in the media culture.
But it is also a result of our new approach toward Time: with everyone overbooked and trying to squeeze 90 seconds into a minute. The quiet exchanges of a "courtesy-driven" culture become more impractical when Time becomes the enemy.
Enjoying the blog so far.
... Nate (SLC)
You have traveled a lot and it shows you how much the decline of politeness everywhere. I find myself having been guilty of the lack of politeness as well. I don't know if it is the prevailing mood I feel (shortness of funds) or what.
Ron
I couldn't agree with you more. Being polite (and teaching politeness to children) is a dying art (along with handwriting). And it's a shame because manners matter. At every level of life, you remember the people who impressed you with manners.
I don't want to go off on a sociological rant here...but it just seems further evidence of the coarsening of our culture.
I, for one, applaud your rage against rudeness and the general disposition toward everyone taking things for granted.
Will
Post a Comment